My Daughter the Guinea Pig

Tomorrow DH and I will be taking LJ to his first USC football game. That alone will, no doubt, produce countless blog worthy experiences. Just thinking about the fun we’ll have tomorrow makes me want to go on an on about it. I must save that for another day. Instead, I’m posting on the experience my daughter will be having tomorrow.

DH and I are card carrying members of the “It Takes A Village” society. We’re blessed to have both sets of our parents in close proximity. LJ attends preschool where my Mom teaches and he takes a day off from school each week to hang out with my wonderfully supportive in laws. Our parents, combined with our siblings, their spouses, as well as our friends, rarely leave us without babysitting resources. Oddly enough the stars aligned against us tomorrow and babysitting options were limited. There was a moment in the week where it was appearing that I would be sending my boys off in their cardinal and gold without me. DH came to the rescue and managed to arrange a tag team of sitters for the day.

J-Mo’s day will start off normally enough. We’ll wake up, get her dressed, fed and wind her up good for the day. My darling sister in law (married to my brother who’s attending the game with us) will come to our house and hang out for a number of hours. This is a great solution. J-MO is obviously familiar with our house and my sister in law is a capable and experienced (key!) babysitter. The two will no doubt have a grand time playing with blocks and trucks (yes my daughter is playing with toys handed down from her brother) and enjoying a fair amount of cuddle time. Both will be blessed by their time together and I will get a good jump on tailgating knowing that my daughter is happy and well cared for in the safety of our own home.

Mid day there will be a hand off. My brother in law, DH’s youngest brother, a mid twenty-something with absolutely no experience with babies and his adorable and babysitting inclined future wife will be coming over to relieve my sister in law of her J-MO watching duties. Tailgating happiness will continue as I know there are two sets of eyes on our precious sixteen month old. As day turns to evening, coincidentally as we approach kick-off time at the stadium, things on the babysitting front will get a bit dicey. Adorable and babysitting inclined future sister in law will head to work leaving mid twenty something with absolutely no experience with babies alone with our darling daughter. Brother in law and future sister in law will be taking our precious cargo back to their place as not to trap them at our house. The timing is such that there will be about a two hour window where twenty-something brother in law with absolutely no experience with babies will be alone with our girl in their house that is far from baby proofed, that has a pond, that they share with a dog. My only hope is that the alcohol consumed during the pre-game tailgating session is enough to lessen my stress about the situation or, even better, to take my mind off of it all together.

Yes, mid twenty-something brother in law with absolutely no experience with babies will be the sole person in charge of our daughter. Poor guy has never changed a diaper. Not a single one. Ever. We’re attempting to make the process as easy as possible. DH is dropping by their house tonight to drop off, and incidentally set up, the pack n play as well as install the car seat into their vehicle. While dropping off the gear required to care for our daughter DH will be giving his brother a quick lesson on the art of diaper changing using a poor, unsuspecting, doll. I think it would be a better idea for him to make mid twenty-something brother in law attempt to diaper their puppy. Yes, that would better demonstrate the squirminess and Houdini like sills of our little one. Alas, DH will show him just how “easy” it is all the while laughing about the experience his brother (and our daughter!!) will share tomorrow.

I know that my brother in law adores our daughter. I know that he will do all he can to protect her and care for her. It’s simply that I can’t even begin to explain to him all the trouble the little one can get into inside two minutes, let alone two hours. I can’t wait to hear about the items she attempted to ingest or the couches she attempted to base jump off of. Yes, it will be an adventure. As the game kicks off and my pre-game buzz fades my attention will, no doubt, turn to what is happening back in Long Beach. Did J-MO go down well for him? Did she fight him? Did she have poop blow out of epic proportions? I fear the experience will be so traumatic that poor brother in law will declare he will never have children.

Yes, I will enjoy watching USC, hopefully, take care of business vs. Cal but I will, the whole time, be wondering if twenty-something brother in law with absolutely no experience with babies had a strong enough defense to deal with our sixteen month old.